GoodToGo

Hey the wizard was great! Quick and tidy and totally charming and better yet I got out of there less 24 hours later. Hospitals are no place to heal in. It was the usual go round with the usual suspects in the hospital.

I was wheeled down from the recovery room around 8:30P and urged my erstwhile comrades (i.e. daughter and friend) to go and eat. They had been having a great time chatting and emailing and waiting for me to appear. I felt pretty ok considering that I had been blown up like a balloon and then filled with fluid. Just like one of those ingestible turkeys. Anyway after they assessed that I had indeed survived, they went off for dinner. I of course was also pretty hungry but was limited to crackers, not the chocolate sundae I was jonesing for.

My posse went down for dinner, I buffed up and took a quick few laps around the floor to check things out and because I knew that I had to get moving It was looking like a pretty quiet night on the floor and I found the fridge and the ice cream. Silly me, there’s always a Selma Screamer and this was not different. She was already moaning like crazy from the same surgery as I had (Mavis Staples says that you should always moan so the devil doesn’t know what you’re up to). I had a feeling it might be a long night.

Daughter and friend returned to say good night and bring me some more food. Remember I had done the whole Mr. Clean thing and an IV fluid is not my idea of something delicious, so I was delighted with the grub. They left at 9:30 and I could hear Selma warming up again. See the thing with this surgery is that you have to move to get things going again, and Selma was having none of it. I heard some heated words and then some more screaming. It was getting closer to shift change and I figured a few more laps would do me good and besides if I made nice to the nurses maybe I could get my vitals done first so I could actually go to sleep.

Nah, seems Perky Paula was being replaced by someone with a total tree on her shoulder, who was not happy to be a floater that night and had already heard about Selma. She wanted nothing of my upbeat attitude and I went back to my room to wait for Attila to come rough me up. I was not disappointed, and then we set in for the siege. Attila sent her deputy in every 45 minutes to wake me up, Selma kept up such a racket that at one point I heard her flinging things and someone yelling duck. (No lie!). This went on all night long. At 4:30A.M Attila decided to stop the line, but also to re-do the iv needle just for shits and giggles. She was muttering under her breath how she didn’t like the way the doctor had put the line in. At this point who cares, I’m not going to need it, but trifling with Attila was like trying to train Grawp from Harry Potter not happening. So a little more roughing up but I was released from the lines and started taking more laps. I wanted them to know I was hunky dory and good to go.

When the Wizard appeared at 7:30A and checked me out, he asked if I wanted to go and with a quick nod and a wave of his wand I was off like a prom dress. So now I’m home, hanging out, sleeping a lot and glad that this part of the dance is over.
Keep the faith ya’ll.